If you were raised in a large family or have simply always returned home to the company of other people, living alone can be a difficult transition for you to make. It doesn’t matter if you’ve recently become an empty-nester, ended a relationship with a live-in partner, relocated out of your parent’s home, or put an end to your days of having a roommate: adjusting to an empty domicile can either be a trying experience or a shift that you’re happy to have. In either case, it will take some time to adjust to the new circumstances, but the change could end up being well worth the effort. When contemplating a major shift in one’s life, it is normal to experience some level of apprehension. According to Rikki Clark McCoy, LCSW, “Living alone may be a profoundly emotional experience,” and this is especially true if it is the first time you have done so or if it comes after a period of transition. Living by yourself may bring on emotions of melancholy or isolation, but it’s also a great opportunity to get to know and appreciate yourself better. Your home serves as a haven for you. It ought to be an environment in which one feels both secure and at ease.
It’d that all you need is quieter, or that you have a growing awareness that you’ve outgrown your current setting. It’s possible that in the past you didn’t mind when other people used your body wash, but today the idea upsets you. If it appears like everything that anybody else in the house is doing is driving you crazy, this could be an indication that it’s time for you to leave as well. Spare them the unjustified fury you feel toward them, and spare yourself the needless anguish it would cause. It’s also possible that you’re completely satisfied with your roommates, but you’re simply ready to develop more independence in your life. If the circumstances permit it, buy yourself some time to reflect on the decision you need to make. There is no reason to rush things if you are in a healthy environment.
Table of Contents
There are several advantages to living on your own.
It is common practice for people who share living quarters to split the costs of living there. This is one of the most sought-after benefits of having roommates or a partner who lives in the same house as you. It is a lot less difficult on your financial situation.
On the other hand, living alone has several advantages, including the following:
You are not coerced into engaging in social activities during your free time.
According to psychotherapist Fiana Andrews, EdS, CPsych, just because you live by yourself does not mean that you are lonely. You can take pleasure in the company of others as well as in your own company. Your ability to pick and choose when you wish to be in someone else’s company is something that sets you apart from people who share living quarters. When it comes to privacy and storage, you are no longer restricted to a bedroom. When you live by yourself, the entire dwelling becomes your private enclave. You are free to act however you choose and go wherever you like. You have complete creative control over the arrangement of the items, and you are allowed to put them wherever you like. Do you want to install a table for doing crafts in the dining room or an additional coat rack in the living room? Don’t be afraid to try. You have complete ownership of the area.
It gives one more power
You are the leader of your sphere of influence. Your choices have no room for reconsideration. You take on an increased amount of responsibility when you live by yourself. You may need to become skilled in activities that were previously handled by another member of your household, such as managing the household budget, preparing meals, and performing simple home repairs. This circumstance may be great for the development of life skills as well as the learning of how to trust oneself. You develop a deeper understanding of who you are. When you live by yourself, you have the opportunity to spend uninterrupted time with yourself, free from the influence of others. When you’re in a situation like this, you have the perfect opportunity to focus on where you are, what you require, and what makes you happy. Checking in with oneself is what McCoy refers to it as.
How to determine whether or not it is right for you.
Both living alone in space and sharing it with other people both have their advantages and disadvantages. Pick the living condition that will benefit your health and happiness the most. Some of the following are indications that you might not be enjoying the experience, at least not right now:
- You don’t make the most of the time you already have to yourself by enjoying those quiet moments.
- The idea of being solely responsible for the upkeep of a home is mentally and physically taxing.
- You are either experiencing a difficult moment right now or are emotionally distressed.
- Even though you live with someone else, you are frequently overcome by feelings of isolation.
Advice to be followed when you are living alone
You could still have feelings of isolation, even though living by yourself has provided you with more personal space and you generally like the experience of doing so. Everyone does. You just don’t want it to consume you. The following are some suggestions for avoiding prolonged feelings of isolation while living alone:
Get into a consistent daily regimen.
When it comes to helping her clients adjust to living on their own, McCoy emphasizes the importance of learning how to effectively manage their time. She notes that it is usual for feelings of loneliness to be at their worst in the morning and at night when we don’t have a lot going on. Creating routines for both the morning and the evening might help you keep yourself occupied with things that are beneficial to your health. If you want to start the day off on the right foot, McCoy suggests doing anything other than checking the notifications on your phone first thing in the morning. “This can be anything from ten to fifteen minutes of action, such as praying, meditating, stretching, or doing a yoga flow.” Even if you’re not planning on going anywhere, she recommends getting dressed and having some breakfast once you’ve gotten yourself moving and organized. In terms of your bedtime routine, it ought to be something that facilitates the maintenance of some structure and gets you ready for a restful night’s sleep. McCoy enjoys the calming effects of aromatherapy, so it’s no surprise that he uses it.
Reduce the amount of time you spend on social media.
McCoy stresses the importance of monitoring the amount of time spent on various social media platforms. “Do you just quickly glance through your feed, or do you find yourself losing track of time and spending hours on social media?” She observes that the longer we use the platform, the greater the likelihood that we will compare ourselves to other users. If it appears like everyone else but you is in a relationship or having a great time with friends, this will only serve to amplify the feelings of isolation that you are experiencing. According to McCoy’s advice, you should spend that time engaging in other things instead, such as reading, listening to a podcast, or doing something for yourself. This forces you out of your thoughts and into the here and now, which is an important step in becoming more independent and comfortable in your own company.
Maintain close relationships with those you care about.
According to Andrews, the moment you notice that you are beginning to feel alone, you should develop a “quick connection.” This could involve sending a message to a close friend or making a video chat with a member of the family. Don’t give in to the want to let the feeling consume you. It is not necessary to cut off ties with loved ones or former housemates simply because you no longer share a residence with them. McCoy emphasizes that maintaining connections with one’s social network is necessary for good health, even though most of us prefer to feel at ease in our own company. Keep in touch with the individuals that bring you joy and who are there to support you. This covers close friends and relatives as well.
Establish brand new relationships.
Meetup and Eventbrite are two examples of useful apps that can be used to find individuals with similar interests and bring them together. There are other people out there that share your passion for whatever it is that you enjoy doing. Getting together with them might be a helpful way to combat feelings of isolation.
There Are 60 Amazing Benefits of Living Alone
We are here to tell you that the decision you’ve made is mature, sensible, and one that you won’t come to regret in the future. There are a lot more advantages to living on your own than there are sprinkles on the ice cream sundae you’re currently eating with a spoon.
- You are free to be as organized or disorganized as you see fit. Nobody will bother themselves with your messes.
- You can select the decoration for the entirety of your space.
- There isn’t any competition for limited amounts of private space. You are free to take anything you want off the coffee table.
- Now that everything is in order, you can at long last relax and take it easy.
- However, if the room becomes too quiet, you are free to sing along to your favorite music without the need for headphones.
- You are not required to make any concessions regarding the content available on Netflix. You are the only person who can use the remote control. Binge away!
- Since you don’t have to give anybody else access to your Netflix and Hulu accounts, the “Recommended for You” section will most accurately reflect your varied preferences in goth movies and cookery series.
- You don’t need to worry about labeling your goods because you own everything that’s in the refrigerator.
- You don’t have to be concerned about the food that your roommate stores in the refrigerator going bad and stinking up the apartment.
- There is no stigma attached to placing an order for a huge pizza on Seamless and then following it up with an order for cookie cake two hours later.
- You are free to prepare whatever food you like, and it can be as pungent or as spicy as you like it to be.
- You are not responsible for taking out the rubbish of anyone else.
- If you want to avoid having to clean the glass, you can save yourself some time by drinking directly from the carton.
- You don’t have to be concerned about someone stealing your stockpile of snacks. No one will do that.
- All of that wine, in its entirety For You.
- It is possible to prepare a sizable meal and have enough food for the rest of the week’s meals in the leftovers.
- You are not being badgered by anyone to finish washing the dishes.
- In addition to that, there will be fewer dishes for you to wash.
- You don’t need to remind your roommates about the rent regularly. You reign supreme over all of the bills.
- You can keep your clothing on the floor for as long as you wish.
- Or inside the clothes dryer.
- You don’t need to give the impression that you are engaged in each facet of your roommate’s day.
- You are free to go anywhere
- When you need to get things done, there are no distractions for you to deal with.
- You don’t need to put up with your roommate’s undesirable behaviors, such as leaving the toilet seat up.
- You are free to use the restroom without having to close the door behind you.
- It is not required that your toilet paper be placed in the holder. It can go wherever you like atop the holder.
- You don’t have to worry about your roommate using up the last of the toilet paper because you have plenty for yourself.
- Then you should tell them that it is now their responsibility to purchase the next box of Charmin.
- You don’t need to cope with clearing out your roommate’s feces.
- Or get a whiff of your roommate’s poop.
- You do not have to wait for your roommate to finish using the bathroom before you can use it yourself. You can put it to use whenever the mood strikes you!
- You don’t need to be concerned about your roommate using your high-end shampoo and conditioner ever again.
- The hair that is caught in the drain of the shower belongs to you and only you.
- It is in no way inappropriate to sing Adele when you are in the shower. Feel free to belt it out with all you might.
- Not to mention the fact that you can dance as if no one is seeing you. Simply because no one else is!
- You are not required to greet anyone with “good morning” until you have arrived at your place of employment.
- You have the opportunity to devote more time to hone your skills, whether they are in oil painting or playing the flute.
- When you arrive home from work, everything is in the same state as it was when you left it.
- Are you interested in adopting a pet? The allergies of your roommate will not be a consideration in this decision.
- You can communicate with your cat. There will be no judgments made.
- You might also converse with yourself.
- You don’t have to worry about someone losing your mail or even touching it because no one has access to your mailbox.
- It is not necessary to inform your roommate in advance that you would be bringing someone into the house with you.
- Alternatively, you may inquire about getting permission to bring guests over.
- You won’t have to deal with an inebriated roommate who gets home at three in the morning.
- Or the inebriated roommate who cannot remember where they put the key.
- No one will be there to see you completely break down. The best part is that you don’t need to make any apologies for them!
- You won’t have to interact with the guests that your roommate’s buddies invite over.
- Since no one will be playing Xbox at maximum volume at four in the morning, you should be able to get a few additional winks of sleep. (Except if you count yourself in that someone.)
- You have complete control over the temperature in the unit. Cold? Hot? There are no restrictions!
- No one will look at you funny if you sneak off into your bedroom with your so-called “best friend” and stay there for several hours at a time.
- You won’t get in any trouble for staying in on a Friday night if you do so.
- The alarm of another person will never jolt you awake.
- Being unwell allows you to let everything out. Whatever it is, wherever it is, cough, sneeze, or throw up.
- Have you misplaced your keys? Simply contact that one particular person and ask if you can spend the night at their place. It is a reasonable excuse.
- If you want to perform all of those less-than-sexy yoga positions in your living room, you can do so without anyone seeing you and even if you fall on your face.
- You acquire the ability to create a budget.
- You have a throne in the form of a couch.
- And as a final point, having unrestricted privacy implies not having to wear clothes.
Frequently Asked Questions
What are some of the benefits of choosing to live by oneself?
There are a lot of perks that come with living on your own, and a lot of them revolve around the fact that you may set your own rules for how you want to live your life. When there is no one else in your living space than yourself, you have complete control over everything from the decoration and cleaning to the routines and policies of the home. The advantages are listed below.
Tidiness According to Your Specific Requirements
When it comes to keeping your living environment clean and organized, the rules you follow are completely up to you when you live by yourself. This is true regardless of how neat or messy you tend to be, or where you fall on the hoarding spectrum. You are free to clean according to your timetable and criteria, and you won’t have to worry about feeling bad if you have to rush out the door and don’t have time to wash the dishes from breakfast.
Guests on Your Terms and Conditions
Since you are the only one renting the property, you have complete authority over who enters your area. You won’t need to consult with a roommate about your guest, and you won’t have to worry about the possible discomfort of bringing a friend or partner into a home where the rooms and things are shared. In a similar vein, you won’t have to be concerned about a potential roommate inviting people over to their house, hosting parties, or, even worse, leaving you with an undesirable roommate if their partner is there for more than five days a week.
You aren’t required to be a Team Player
When multiple people live in the same location, it can be difficult to keep track of whose belongings are whose and what is and is not allowed to be touched. It’s possible that your favorite cereal or toothpaste could start to go missing, or that your brand-new black cardigan will turn up on your roommate’s floor. One of the advantages of choosing to live on your own is that you won’t have to divide up your possessions with anyone else. Also, you won’t have to wait in line to use the washing and dryer, and you won’t have to share the restroom or the common rooms (unless you live in an apartment complex with a shared laundry room).
Confidentiality Is Guaranteed
You are free to fully live life on your terms because you do not have to divide up your living space with anyone else (concerning your neighbors, of course). Do you want to go down in your jammies in the comfort of your living room? After a trying and exhausting day, do you find yourself craving a pint of ice cream and some quiet time to yourself? When it comes to doing your taxes, do you have to spread out all of your financial paperwork on the kitchen table? If you live alone, you have the freedom to do all of those things in the quiet of your apartment without fear of criticism from other people.
You Only Pay for the Services You Rely on since you are the only person using and paying for utilities, you do not risk having excessive utility bills. In addition, if you leave town, you won’t be responsible for paying for the utilities that you haven’t used. If lowering your expenses and preserving resources is a priority for you, living on your puts you in complete command of those factors.
Freedom of expression combined with physical space
When you live by yourself in an apartment, you have the freedom to design, furniture, and organize your living space any way you see fit, which is one of the major benefits of this arrangement. For instance, if you live in a studio apartment, you can section off the area and rearrange it so that it is more conducive to the way you lead your life. On the other hand, if you live in an apartment that has two bedrooms, you have the option of turning one of those rooms into an office, a hobby room, or a bedroom for guests. Your trinkets and photographs of the family can be displayed everywhere you like, including on the walls, shelves, and countertops.
What are some of the drawbacks of living alone?
The list of negative aspects of living alone in an apartment is, of course, going to be the exact opposite of the list of positive aspects. On the other hand, taking into account your way of life and the features of renting a home that is most essential to you, you might not give the disadvantages as much weight.
You Might Experience Loneliness or Boredom
One of the most significant negatives of living alone is the increased likelihood of experiencing feelings of loneliness and isolation. When you are the only person at home at any given time, it can be isolating, even though it might be relaxing to come back to a peaceful and unoccupied house after a busy day or after a trip. If you don’t have a roommate, there won’t be anyone around to cheer you up when you’re going through a bad patch, rejoice with you on a whim, or unload your frustrations at the end of a long day. It also implies that you won’t have access to the resources, social networks, or activities that potential housemates may bring to the table In a similar vein, MB360 in San Francisco provides its tenants with a fitness center, a swimming pool, a clubhouse, and outdoor areas in which they can congregate and interact.
You are solely responsible for your maintenance and chores.
The fact that you are responsible for all of the domestic tasks and responsibilities is a drawback of living alone, even though it allows you to clean according to your schedule and frees you from the obligation to divide anything. You won’t have any roommates with whom you may divide up chores like doing a thorough cleaning, emptying the trash, loading the dishwasher, checking the mail, and other similar activities.
The cost of living is typically higher overall
You are also responsible for paying for all of the costs associated with the flat. Although you may be conscientious about how you use resources to save money, your name is on every utility statement. And this is true even if you live in a one-room flat because the average rent rises whenever the number of occupants on a lease falls. When deciding whether or not to live alone, one of the most important decisions to make is whether or not to rent an apartment that is already furnished or whether or not to decorate the apartment from scratch. These are the sorts of expenses that are commonly split among roommates. There are, thankfully, methods to decorate on a budget and avoid the hefty upfront expenditures of furniture, such as renting from firms like Furnish. One of these strategies is to paint your walls a bold color.
Should I Move in by Myself or Should I Find a Roommate?
Now that you’ve considered the primary benefits and drawbacks of living by yourself, you need to evaluate whether or not this kind of living arrangement is appropriate for you. From there, you may conduct an analysis of your way of life as well as your financial situation to select the appropriate floor plan. For some people, the best compromise between their need for privacy and their want to be part of a community may be to rent a studio apartment in a complex that offers many different amenities. The bedroom, living room, and kitchen or kitchenette are all combined into one open area in a studio apartment, which is a type of one-room apartment that also includes a bathroom. There is room for a bed as well as a living area and a kitchen in a studio apartment, even though there are no walls or other separators in the layout of the flat to separate those rooms. Although the actual square footage of a studio apartment can vary depending on the location and the building, it is usually always less expensive than an apartment with one bedroom. A studio apartment is a terrific alternative for someone who is living alone for the first time since it is large enough to be decorated according to your taste and to host guests, but it is also small enough to keep the cost of utilities and the amount of cleaning that is required to a minimum. If your apartment complex does not have such amenities, however, the cozier space may not be as helpful.
There is a distinction between feeling lonely and being alone. Your mental health needs to be able to make that distinction and resist the temptation to believe that just because you live by yourself that you are isolated and that no one cares about you. Find out how to deal with living by yourself and what you need to do to be successful in the environment. Things as simple as making your space feel like home and taking time for self-care can go a long way toward improving your mental health. You won’t even remember how you ever functioned without your own space before too long.